Hi there Wise women,

CHRISTMAS IS ON ITS WAY..

Ho Ho Ho!!!  Merry Christmas to one and all.

Yes - the countdown is on.  Honestly, can you believe?  We were celebrating Christmas just the other day, weren't we!  Time flies so quickly and here we are again, buying presents, making puddings, flitting from one Christmas event to the next.  

This Christmas we are celebrating a slap up lunch with all the family on Christmas Eve.  The kids were thrilled as they could have a full day with us and then on Christmas Day, they are all off to a full day with their in-laws. 

So there will be a bit of mutual sharing on the Day itself so we won't be completely abandoned.

IT'S GOOD TO BE FAT

Isn't this the news you need to be hearing right about now!

Being a little bit fatter is a little bit better, and who is sprouting these cheery words you might ask.  It is our very own Aussie Professor Leon Flicker out of WA  

     Yes, it's the good news that those extra pounds can just help you along in your older age we are reliably informed. 

Now this is truly music to the ears of all of us trying to budge those persistent pounds.  Our bodies actually know what is best for us it seems...it stacks on weight because apparently it is good for it!!! 

'They found that those overweight were 13 per cent less likely to die from any cause over a 10-year period, compared with those of normal weight.

Those underweight were 76 per cent more likely to die, while obese elderly people had the same mortality risk as those of normal weight.'

I wonder if having extra body weight means: that you are eating well, which means you can afford food, which means you can probably afford the Doctors visit, chemist requirements, dentist and complimentary alternatives that will help to keep you alive.  

And of course those glamorous' thinbees' are actually heading towards frailty because they are owners of thin crispy bones for nasty breaks, less muscle tissue for supporting joints and thinning skin etc.  Ouch!

What to do!  We are told the road to being desirable is thin thin thin....but who is thinking about desirable when you get older!!! Only joking!!!   But will the glamous thin baby boomers be unwittingly reducing their life span the thinner and more desirable they get!.  How does all that work I ask!!!! 

Whilst making mad passionate love in the mad effort of remaining desirable,  we will end up crushing our thin bones -  Ha! the mind boogles!!!!

I think I will have another biscuit!

SO WHAT HAVE I BEEN DOING LATELY!

It has been ages since a wrote a long long blog so it is time to let you know a few of the things that have been going on in my life - those wiser years that we all have going now!!!!

DOCTOR'S VISIT

I finally got around to making an appointment at the doctors to have some seborrheic keratose removed from my back.  You know summer is coming up and you want to look your best don't you!  

Well, in my mind the whole thing is an ordeal - you have to remember to make the appointment, and steal yourself for the event.  I didn't care which Dr at my medical practice could do it and so I got a very young newbie - Dr Chong and I am sure I have scarred her for life!!!  I sauntered in and explained I wanted all of them removed.  'Let's have a look'.  She combed my back gently tapping and umming.

 'Which one bothers you?'  she said

'All of them' I said.  She diligently measured and agonised and announced the one I was really concerned about was over the 6mm size.  'It is too big - you will need it cut off'  she said. 'Put your top on and we will talk about it'

'Ah Ah!!! I am not leaving these premises,' I said, 'until you have removed some of them so I will wait here while you get the cylinder to freeze them off!'

She was frozen to the spot with my reply I think.  I sat there not moving.

She sighed and said ' I will have to fill up the cylinder'.

Oh...so was that the matter....pretty scary filling up the cylinder!!!  Anyhow she came back and I almost had to break her leg to do three.  What an effort the whole thing was.  It cost heaps and I only got three done and goodness only knows whether they have been done properly!!!

TERRIFYING TEETH CLEANING ORDEAL

Due to the Lichen 'planusoid' condition of my gums, the doctor and the dentist recommended the health Hygienist.  The only people who would front up to be become Dental Hygienists would have to be a masochists!!!!  My god, I thought the whole experience was the most dreadful thing I have ever done. 

I have had my teeth cleaned at the dentist many times with the sand blasting - but why not take a further step if you dare -  into the nightmare world of periodontal scaling!

Firstly the Dental Hygienist surveyed the damage (which thankfully was not bad)  and then she started with the ultrasonic water blaster.  This a tool of torture and is excruciating in the extreme.  The gum around every tooth was peeled back to reveal the upper tooth area!! She spent an hour blasting this horrible instrument along every tooth line (those cold teeth felt the pain like no tomorrow) and between each teeth which I felt like teeth removal.  Ouch! I was lying there thinking, I can't believe I am sitting here letting this women inflict such pain on me.  I was rigid with tension. 

When she finished that I sighed in relief, I could make my escape - but no, the 'scaling of plaque and calculus was the next step.   A horrible tool called a 'hand scaler' was driven across each tooth so strongly I assumed I wouldn't have any teeth left when she had finished.  I thought it sounded and felt like tooth extraction.  

Finally, finally, finally, when that was finished I had a green sludge of fluoride painted on my teeth and left for 2 minutes.  Even though I could only spit it out and not rinse for an hour, it was definitely the highlight!   That was it thank goodness!! 

I had to prize my fingers from the edge of the chair to sit up!  'That was absolutely awful' I said.  'Oh it is not supposed to hurt, but this is your first time - next time will be much better'. 

Next time, what did she mean - next time!!! 

She then proceed to teach me about how to clean my teeth and all the new devices there are on the market to make it easier to keep them looking brilliant.  I will be buying every single implement and I will use them like a person obsessed.  

When she said 'See you in 6 months' I almost fell down the spiral staircase.  After paying and dragging my still rigid body to the car I phoned Mr G to describe my past hour and a half.  He said I was exaggerating and maybe I am and maybe I am not...but let me just put it to you this way, I am not looking forward to my next session.  I will need a tranquiller dart I think!

I was so cheerful when I went in and left a shuddering wreck of a woman!!! But hey, I now have the pearliest white, shiniest, glamorous teeth in town!!!  Yep, there was an upside!!!  I liken it to childbirth really!

OPERATION RESULTS

                I'll be back!

Well, I did say I would report back to you when I had my last visit with the Dr.  I was very keen to hear what he had to say,

I visited him at the surgery in November.

 'Ummmmmmmm.    Hold you arms this way, that way.   Ummmmmm.  You'll need to have that side done again' 

DING, DING, DING Red alert!!!  I was fearing those words and now I heard them.  You see, the left side is astonishingly brilliant.  I have the underarm of a thirty year old.  But the right side although it is devoid of the excess flesh, is just not quite right side of 'completely devoid'!  

Oh darn!!!  In a way it is lucky I had a good experience in the hospital last time so I am not that worried but it is just such an inconvenience.  So next May ladies I do the whole thing again to get my desired underarms.........

I am getting so old that perfect underarms seem like a weird and peculiar desire!!!! 

Oh well, I have come this far and so the journey continues... I will have to keep busy at the gym to keep all that area trim and tight!!!  So yes, there are benefits in this long drawn out saga.  I'll keep you posted.

HOME RENOVATIONS

I am dreaming of rainbows

Yes, we are at it again.  Last time I wrote about this topic I said that it could ruin my marriage.  Well, this time Mr G tried to kill himself and then me!!!! 

Electricity is not a thing you play around with and with all the carefullness in the world Mr G decided to come up close and personal with a live powerpoint.  As he yelled and flew across the room, my daughter and I looked on horrified.  He was OK thankfully but it could have turned out badly.  

Then a few days later as I was helping to remove a magnetic board from the wall it moved upwards and knock the family crest which spun down and hit me on the head.  This crest weighs as much as a brick and was like a sledge hammer blow.  

As a crept around the house with my hands on my head saying things like 'this is really bad, I mean this is really dreadful' and Mr G saying 'Oh you'll be alright'.  I took my hands away to find they were coated with blood, my hair was bright red and there were red gushes down my forehead.   I had a feeling the damage would be bad!!!  After washing away the blood and applying a cold pack to my head I managed to avoid the hospital for some stitches.  I eyeball that crest now, with sheer dislike!!

But our new painting and flooring job gives me such delight the dramas were worth it...I say this only because we are still alive to enjoy it though!!!! Ha!

GATHERINGS

HAPPY CHRISTMAS FROM US TO YOU

Well, folks I have met up with Lana a few times over the past few months due to our shared granddaughters end of years activities..... the Kindy and Dance Academy spectaculars.  These events are what we grandmothers live to enjoy.  

Miss C graduates from Kindy with her dad (my son) and mum (Lana's daughter)

Miss C took to the stage like a pro this year. Last year had her from peering from behind the curtains to this year - taking to the stage like she was born to it.  What a difference a year makes.  The Dance School was her 4 minutes of fame.  

                        A little dinosaur

Centre stage she played a dinosaur in the prettiest green tutu you have ever seen and told her mother that she loved the stage and didn't want to get off.  Who knows where all this could lead?

Lana is in fine form and very busy with a new business venture which is why she hasn't had the time to share with you at the moment.  Travelling and organising means her heart and energies are being directed to that while it gets going so I look on in awe as she tackles something yet again. 

Good luck Lana as you embrace another challenge

WORK CHRISTMAS LUNCH

The great bunch of people I work with.

WHAT DO YOUR CLOTHES SAY ABOUT YOU

Well, that's the name of Trinny & Susannah's book on clothing help!  But have you ever wondered what you clothes do say about you.  Do they say I am fun and interesting or are they shouting, tired and boring!!!!  They might be saying I am expensive so I must show style or they might say I don't have any taste in clothing at all. 

Well, you have to think about it and when you are older and wiser it is a challenge that's for sure.  What in the heck do you wear to help you retain your youthfulness?  There is the fine line between looking ridiculous in trying to look hip (and I admit I do go there) or  trying to look 'within your age group' !  Ha, who wants to be respectable if that means boring.

Self Portrait - special record of me wearing a dress!!  My first one in decades!

I don't want to look or be boring.  I imagine myself in the future as an old old woman wearing incredible combinations and flowers in my hair as I try to avoid the geriatric  look. 

If I can't wear Chanel that WOULD scream style - then I'll opt for oddball!

But seriously, I think we all want to look stylish and beautiful but it is hard when you are grappling with an - dare I say it - older body.  I know a lot of women say they can wear what they bloody well like now they are older - and whilst this is absolutely true it is a bit of cop out to give up!!  

There are lots of lovely shops that cater for our shape and really, the fashion industry  have realised we are out there and we want style.  There are a couple of really good options -  Blue Illusions has a terrific selection of flattering stylish clothing that anyone would be proud to be seen in.  

Try looking at Metalicus with their layers upon layers of interesting shapes and colours - take your cheque book though!!!  I am a little bit in love with Charlie Brown's glorious fabrics and trendy styles.  Look around your shopping centre and discover the shop that delivers the clothes that will say what you want them to say. 

The thing is never to be shy.  Get the accessories happening and let your clothing reflect your inner you.  But for goodness sake don't be boring.

LET'S GET FIT         

Well I wrote the bit about having extra pounds as a good thing before I launched into let's get fit.  I have only lost another couple of pounds since my last blog and whilst this seem a miserable amount I am actually as fit as a fiddle and firming up.  So there is the conundrum!!!  I go to the gym often - and the last three weeks have been doing body attack followed by KiMax - 2 hours of hard core.  For two whole hours of jumping, running, punching and side kicks I am on such a high when I leave.  

Exercise provides me with some sort of inexplicable vim and vigour that nothing else does. Honestly it does - try if for yourself.

Just because you are older don't be ashamed or embarrassed about going to the gym.  Just get your body moving and have a great time.  I must say I feel pretty proud of my wiser body as I leap and bound like the young ones.  There is something very empowering about that, strange as it may seem!

So as I regale stories of my 'gym going' I am really trying to inspire you to take a chance, and risk a launch into a world where agelessness is given to you in hourly doses.

So get started, keep motivated and get your endurance happening.

MOVIES - loved both of these.....

GOOD OLD AUSSIE - RED DOG

What a great little Australian film even if the star was actually American - and I'm not talking about the dog here..  Josh Lucas, he was meant to be a Amercian in the film, is totally divine.  How have I missed out on noticing him before. The dog was absolutely brilliant - but I believe there were a few dogs!!  it is a feel good movie - but take it from me - it is tears at the end. 

VERY WOODY ALLEN - MIDNIGHT IN PARIS 

I really got into this feel good movie.  Owen Wilson stars and is fantastic in this delightful adventure that has you smiling from start to finish.  A must see.

WORDS OF WISDOM

For a sweet, simple and to the point  here is a lovely quote:

Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful  - N V Peale

I wish you a very happy, healthy and safe and beautiful Christmas and also wish you every dream come true in the New Year.

We'll be seeing you then....

Love